Guilt Doesn't Get You There

These days, with social media and technology, it’s easy to confuse number of connections with depth of relationship. We settle for social gatherings full of small talk, consistent interactions on Facebook, and quick work conversations to fill us up. But settling for these kinds of relationships over deep relationships is like eating a bag of chips when you’re hungry for a meal. The chips may curb your hunger for the moment, but you will be hungry again.  Yet, we settle for these kinds of superficial relationships over and over again and wonder why we feel so lonely. Anxiety and depression are at an all time high in teens and young adults. We have to wonder if the width of connection may be replacing depth of connection and how that replacement is affecting our mental and spiritual health. We were made for the kind of connection that the Trinity models for us. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are in perfect unity. They are committed to one another and in perfect community with one another. If we were made in the image of the Trinity, we were made to reflect this kind of beautiful community with one another. This doesn’t mean that we have to invest in every single person in our lives. Even Jesus didn’t invest in more than twelve people. He had relationships with more than twelve, but he gave himself to the twelve and heavily invested in three within that twelve. Jesus modeled for us the impact of unyielding commitment to a few friends. Jesus revealed parts of himself to these three that he didn’t to the rest, like in the Garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-37) and on a mountaintop during his transfiguration (Matthew 17:1-2). If we want committed relationships in our lives, it starts with looking to Jesus and following his example with others in our lives. Reflection/Discussion Question: How does thinking about the community within the Trinity help you think differently about your own community?

Sometimes, we can wonder why God feels distant, why we can’t hear his voice, why we can’t feel his love, his comfort, his peace, or his strength. In these times, we must take a close look at our lives and evaluate whether or not we are living in isolation. Sure, we can have a lot of “friends” to hang out with to talk about surface-level topics. We can be surrounded by people at work, and our houses full of hustle and bustle; but we still feel the pangs of isolation. Why is God so distant? Because we aren’t in real community with other believers. We choose isolation when we pretend like we have it all together. When we portray that we are perfect, we communicate that we don’t need people and we don’t need God. But we all struggle with insecurities, inadequacies, weaknesses, and hardships. People won’t be fooled by our facade, God sees right through it, and we sure haven’t fooled ourselves. And yet, we’d rather keep the facade and miss out on God’s love, grace, strength, comfort, and peace than share our weaknesses and embrace the fullness of God expressed through his children. If you want to experience God’s comfort, share your hardships with your community and watch them become the tangible representation of his comfort. If you want to experience God’s strength, share your weaknesses and watch your community hold you up. If you want to experience God’s grace, confess your sin to your community and feel the shackles of guilt and shame fall from your heart. God does his best work in the context of community. Since we are made in the image of God, we get to be the tangible expression of his character to the people around us. We may pray for comfort for a friend, but God is calling us to be that comfort. Prayer is valuable, but we may find that it often calls us to action to be the hands and feet of Jesus, carrying the good news of his grace and love to all believers. Reflection/Discussion Question: What is one step you can take to remove the facade that you have it all together and become more vulnerable with your community?

I have a friend/co-worker who is going through a very hard time with her husband. She was wanting to try marriage counseling but money is tight as they now have 2 kids under two and her husband was fired several months back. So, a few of the ladies I’m in a Bible study with on Thursdays decided to pool our money together to help them pay for marriage counseling sessions. We were able to pay for 3 sessions for them. My friend was in tears thanking us for our kindness and all the prayers said on her and her husband’s behalf. She has since come to church with me once and wants to come back as soon as her schedule allows. Please keep praying for my friend and her husband because I know God is working!

I have A friend who has struggled with addiction for A while. I have made a commitment to always be available for him if necessary. When he calls I answer if he needs a ride I’ll take him.